Why A White Female Yoga Teacher Like Me Cannot Be Racist Based On Astrological Statistics, Spiritually-Bypassy Platitudes, Scientific-Ish “Facts” Found In Memes and Starlight

  1. Your thoughts create your reality. So racism doesn’t actually exist. It’s just your evil thoughts. If you choose to think this way, that’s all you’ll see. I choose to think love and light, so that’s all I see. Also, I’m White. #radiatepossiblity

  2.  99.95333333~= % of people do not have a racial bone in their body. They have a thigh bone, but they don’t have a racial bone. Without racial bones, you cannot be a racist. I learned this in my yoga teacher training anatomy class attended by all White people and led by a famous White male teacher.

  3. I live in a highly diverse White neighborhood. In light of recent events I learned from Instagram, I tried to see color for the first time in my life and was amazed to notice so many people of color. Would you believe that of the 125 people arrested for social distancing violations in my community, nearly all of them were Black or Latino? Who knew there were so many people of color here? I had never acknowledged their existence before because I don’t see color— I just see someone’s love and light truth.

  4. I’m that girl who listens to gangsta rap on my to yoga. My t-shirt says so. #ghettosuperstar #throwonsomegangstarapandhandleit

  5. I’ve been surrounded by people of different colors for as long as I can remember making up my own reality! I grew up in a very White neighborhood and went on to live in another even Whiter one, but still I‘m just so grateful for the remarkable diversity of this bubble I call home. Just look at this picture I posted on Instagram of me and a Black person from my teacher training in India three years ago. Not that I ever noticed her color. If I ever had to describe her, like, to the cops, I’d say: She’s a tall, love and light-radiating being! I forget her name.

  6. My daughter has been surrounded by all different races her whole life in our highly diverse Whitopia. We eat black lentils. And would you believe she studies French? She speaks a completely different language (ish). As for me, I know Sanskrit after a weekend spent memorizing its alphabet! My mala beads are black! Our home is a living, breathing colorless melting pot where we never, ever talk about race. (We’re White, so we don’t see color!) We are so blessed to live with this rich diversity we imagine exists in our crisp, white lotus-flowered lives.

  7. I’ve heard of Black people getting killed by the police, but I don’t really take notice. This is because I choose not to see color or read news from a reputable source that isn’t astrology-based or pay attention to anything in the world beyond my “Whitopia” love n’light bubble. I just carry so many good vibes in my heart.

  8. All lives matter” is a much more eloquent way of saying “good vibes only” or “we don’t give a Ganesh about systemic racism because we cannot see it as we’re too busy ignoring the world we live in while we use our privilege to create a unicorn-ful, good vibe-ian, kale-juiced “reality” while blasting gangsta rap instead.” Look, we can either choose good vibes only, or bad ones. 99.6333% of positive vibes have the power to kill both bad vibes and Coronavirus. It’s as Martin Luther King said, “hate cannot drive out hate, good vibes only can do that.”

  9. My name isn’t Karen.


  10. I treat everyone the same because we are all one. Does this allow me to ignore and even contribute to long-standing systemic racism that privileges Whites? That makes no sense to me, as I only see the oneness of love and light and not the reality of anything going on in the world. #goodvibesonly

  11. On my Instagram there’s a picture of me with a Black person from a yoga training I did three years ago. Have I mentioned it? Not that I posted it because she was Black or re-shared it or talked about it five trillion times in the last month because of that. It’s not like I even noticed her color. I’m colorblind. I don’t even see the black in my morning coffee. All I see is its latte love and light. #goodvibesonly.

  12. I teach hip hop vinyasa. #spirituallybypassygangster

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“Godd Vibes only” Illustration herein by the inimitable @unrulyascetic aka Zoe Ward

https://www.instagram.com/p/CA-bg1_Dq5w/

https://www.instagram.com/p/CCvsh1bC7Di/

This entry was posted in Blog.

2 thoughts on “Why A White Female Yoga Teacher Like Me Cannot Be Racist Based On Astrological Statistics, Spiritually-Bypassy Platitudes, Scientific-Ish “Facts” Found In Memes and Starlight

  1. Well. A highly defensive piece indeed.

    Honestly the whole article is filled with racist commentary and white supremacy ideology. The world just isn’t as simple as you make out through your white lense.

    Open up! Posting this in the name of yoga? Open your eyes sister and go back to the school of life.

    Please refrain from saying ‘I don’t see colour’ it’s insulting we are not yet, in fact still a long way from the utopia you represent here.

    I asked a simple question to an insta yogi and she couldn’t answer ‘is this yoga’
    She sent me to you, reading this I have no idea why.

    Perhaps you might take the time to read this without your white defensive shield on because that is the only way that we will break down barriers. We want you to see us and our blackness and to honour it specifically for what we have endured as a race and continue to do so. Agreed?
    In Yoga
    Ama
    Afro Yoga

    • Hello: The post is satire. I thought that was clear based on items such as: 9. “My name isn’t Karen” and the inclusion of “starlight in the title, or the title, period.

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